To My Hometown Heroes 💗
Where in the world do you want to be?
Happy Wednesday, my beautiful Twenty-Somethings! I hope you’re all doing as well as can be. I got my second dose of the vax yesterday and my best friend’s in town—this Full Super Moon in Scorpio’s got me feeling like a new woman!
This week’s newsletter is dedicated to everybody living at home, or, in a more metaphorical sense, in their comfort zone.
One of the most common pieces of advice I got before graduating college—especially considering I wanted to work in the notoriously low-wage mediascape—was to live at home post-graduation. And I get that. You save thousands in rent, even if just for a few months. And sometimes, I wish I did.
But ultimately, I’m so glad I didn’t.
Instead, I got a job on the other side of the country in a place I had only been once, and moved there five days after graduation. Let me first acknowledge my extreme privilege in being able to do such a thing, especially straight out of college. If it weren’t for my parents (plus my race, my class status, my education, my generational wealth—you get the gist), I would be nothing, and I have no idea where I’d be today.
But, for all my California kids who “could never deal with cold weather,” or “couldn’t imagine being that far from home,” yadda, yadda, yadda—I want to dare you to do something: dream big, baby!
Moving to Brooklyn was the best decision I ever made. It was scary and new and shiny and forced me to become more independent, and learn about this new adult life in a place I’ve absolutely fallen in love with. The city itself has also helped me fall in love with myself, but that’s a story for another time.
In a similar vein to last week’s Shoot Your Shot newsletter (Please read if you haven’t yet! It’s a fan favorite!), I truly believe everyone needs to stretch and grow by trying new things. And without trying new things, there is no growth. This brings me to yet another one of my favorite mantras: A comfort zone’s a lovely place, but nothing ever grows there!
Did you know that 72 percent of adults live within 20 miles of where they grew up? Further, the typical American only lives 18 miles from Mom.
Okay, let me clarify that there’s absolutely nothing wrong with living at or close to home, or frankly, living within your means. I just want to encourage all of my dearest Twenty-Somethings to go for what it is that they truly want in this life.
It feels like everyone I know wants to live in Austin or Denver or Portland or Seattle or L.A. or Brooklyn or Paris. They want to become a graphic designer or a poet or an architect or a freelance writer. They want to open an Etsy shop or write a screenplay or start a podcast or learn how to rollerblade. They want to date a whole spectrum of people and cover their bodies in tattoos and dye their hair green.
But, like… what’s stopping you? Genuinely, take a look in the mirror and ask yourself: What’s standing in the way of you doing exactly what you want? Yeah, yeah, yeah, finances, responsibilities, a plethora of other totally and genuinely valid reasons, but at the end of the day, it’s you. We’re playing the long game here, y’all. There’s no reason you can’t create a five-year plan for the goals you set today. (I don’t need to remind you I’m a Virgo, do I?)
Maybe it starts with a networking call or a visit to a city you’ve never been before or watching a YouTube tutorial or googling how much a studio apartment in East Village costs. Every big move starts with baby steps, baby!
You’re doing yourself a disservice by never trying new things or doing things that scare you. I challenge you to think of anywhere in the world you want to be right now. And anything you could possibly want to do. Anywhere! Anything! You know you can achieve that if it’s what you really want, right?
Here’s a mantra I’d like to never hear again: Bloom where you’re planted. Really? Go and water different plants in every corner of the world! Sample all the flavors! Figure out where your roots feel best! And please, for the love of all that is good in this world, don’t die in your hometown!
I know I’ll move back to the Bay one day, and I’ll probably read this and laugh. But until then, I don’t have any babies or debt or other responsibilities keeping me from doing everything I want to do—and I’m going to grab my twenties and squeeze every last drop out of them.
I really don’t want to come off as condescending or sanctimonious in any way, I just want to encourage all of you to be all you can be. Sending all my love and positive energy to you ambitious, bright bundles of potential.
And with that, here are a few picks to get you through the week:
LISTEN:
FYI, I’m always accepting recommendations—just like this beautiful, bass-heavy banger! “I put on my jewellery just to go to the bodega!” I mean, she really did that…
Live, love, Princess Nokia. And that’s all I’ve got to say about that!
For my sad girls out there! An incredibly freeing song. Drive on the freeway with the windows down to this one. For me!
READ:
Life of the Party by Olivia Gatwood - Another book by my favorite poet, this time about life and death and violence as a young girl, especially of color. Beautifully dark and always sharp.
The Cut: “I Was Caroline Calloway” - Does anyone remember this 2019 article written by a faux-influencer-gone-wrong’s ghostwriter/semi-friend? What a cultural phenomenon. Read if you haven’t!
Jezebel: “Stories About My Brother” - Okay, so… Wow. A writer recounts stories of her late brother, who passed at only 29. A hard, bittersweet, heart-wrenching read.
WATCH:
Netflix’s Unsolved Mysteries - So I never watched the original, but boy, the reboot’s got my attention. It’s so, so well done, and every story is beyond riveting. Sad, scary, but beautifully done!
Parasite - Unfortunately, I haven’t watched anything else other than Survivor in the last week, but my parents told me they finally watched Parasite, so… if you haven’t watched it, please do! Same goes with Uncut Gems. Enjoy!
LAUGH:
LOVE:
Baloo Weighted Throw Blanket - Okay, I’m obsessed with this weighted throw. It’s cozy, it’s the perfect weight at 12 pounds, and the cotton is gentle on the skin. Plus, it keeps me cool at night—what more could you ask for?
Crap Eyewear Supa Phreek - Yes, I got them! I chose the funky kiwi color, and I’m in love with them. I honestly think this rectangular frame looks good on every face shape, and they’re super high quality at an affordable price. (Sponsor me already, Crap!)
Tarte Shape Tape Ultra Creamy Concealer - I ventured into Manhattan to get more of this Ulta-exclusive concealer I’ve featured before, and to my surprise, they now have it in a more moisturizing formula! For all my dry-skinned gals, this is a must-have.
COOK:
Fried Pickles - My roommate got an air fryer, and… Let’s just say it’s changed my life. I can’t get enough of these. All my pickle lovers, rejoice!
Crispy Roasted Chickpeas - I made these in the air fryer, and I’ve never had a crispier chickpea. Again, they’re incredible in everything: salads, sandos, bowls, you name it. YUM.
CONSIDER:
I was actually there for the taping of this—too good!
Question of the week: What’s one thing you've always wanted to do, but haven’t made the effort to do?
Thank you endlessly for supporting me—it means more to me than you’ll ever know! I’m always looking to improve my work, so leave a comment or send me a message about what you want to read about in the next Dear Twenty-Somethings! I’m all ears.
Connect with me on Twitter, LinkedIn, Goodreads or online if you feel so inclined. And check out last week’s newsletter here in case you missed it.
If you liked what you read, send this newsletter to a friend! Heck, send it to 10 friends! Sending love and light to you, wherever you are. 🌟
Cheers & happy Wednesday! Stay well and I’ll see y’all next week.
xoxoxo, Quinnie <3
Love reading your articles!!🤍