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There Comes a Time...⌛
We love a kismet moment.
Hello and Happy Thursday, my Dearest Twenty-Somethings! I’m so happy to have you here—let me tell you, it’s been a week. While I had something entirely different planned for this week’s newsletter, something came up that I just had to write about. Isn’t that always how these things go?
So I went on one of my need-to-keep-my-sanity-in-NYC-winter-while-working-from-home mid-day walks the other day and passed by my local “little free library,” you know, one of those little wooden structures where people take and leave books. I picked up a copy of Elizabeth Gilbert’s Eat, Pray, Love (which I haven’t read or seen!), and found the following on the inside cover…
I mean… can you imagine a more Quinn-Fish-Dear-Twenty-Somethings-kismet moment?! Obviously, I reflected in my journal and subsequently had to tell all of my Dearest Twenty-Somethings about it.
There comes a time when time passing becomes time remaining.
Chills! Seriously! Just last week I talked about being present and living in the now, which is something I think about often, and a handful of you reached out to tell me that the sentiment resonated with you too. I guess the universe was sending us yet another reminder!
As young folk, I think we frequently stress about time passing, worried that we’re missing out or taking the wrong path or not living up to our fullest potential. When, in reality… how we spend our days is how we spend our lives, baby!
But how do we live in the now when our focus remains on the past or the future? (Once I figure this out, I’ll let you all know.) In the meantime, I find quotes and affirmations help me along the way:
“The greatest obstacle to living is expectancy, which hangs upon tomorrow and loses today… The whole future lies in uncertainty: live immediately.” – Seneca in On the Shortness of Life
“Time is a created thing. To say ‘I don’t have time,’ is to say, ‘I don’t want to.’” – Lao Tzu
“‘Someday’ is a disease that will take your dreams to the grave with you.” – Timothy Ferriss
“You may delay, but time will not.” – Benjamin Franklin
“This time, like all times, is a very good one, if we but know what to do with it.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
“Don’t let the fear of the time it will take to accomplish something stand in the way of your doing it. The time will pass anyway; we might just as well put that passing time to the best possible use.” – Earl Nightingale
“Those who make the worst use of their time are the first to complain of its brevity.” – Jean de La Bruyère
Yes, I googled “best quotes about time.” And what about it?
Us twenty-somethings, in my humble opinion, take advantage of time. We don’t realize how much we have until, as my anonymous note author put it so eloquently, it’s passing. All we know is that this life is short!
And just one note for all of my non-twenty-something readers: as you know, all of this applies to you too! I know I write with a lens of how us zennials see things, but know that I appreciate each and every one of you.
I suppose this is all to say, as I’ve said countless times before: Nothing is more important than today. Tomorrow becomes today becomes yesterday and so on and so on—and that’s life. But tomorrow is never guaranteed, so why not enjoy today? Anywho, much to think about!
In honor of Valentine’s Day coming up, I’d love to know: What have you learned from dating in your twenties? Any inspiring or not-so-inspiring stories you’d like to share? Advice? Thoughts? Let me know here.
In case you were wondering, I’ve been listening to this Middle School Bangerz Spotify playlist—thank me later. With that, here are a few picks to get you through the week:
Summer Fruit by Cecilia Seiter - A pal of mine from college—and an Oakland gal herself—recently published the most delightful little book of prose and poetry. “Drawn from works written over the years of 2018-2021, it serves as a chronicle of a wound splitting open and closing again; an amalgamation of both the sweetness and the sorrow that indulging in the taste of summer fruit is known to give.” I’m obsessed!
Rolling Stone: “Jay-Z and Meek Mill Team Up to Block Rap Lyrics From Being Used in Court” - What an interesting concept. Fat Joe told the reporter: “Our lyrics are a creative form of self-expression and entertainment—just like any other genre. We want our words to be recognized as art rather than being weaponized to get convictions in court.” I totally get it, but it begs the question: If I rap about committing murder, should I then not be held responsible? Hmm.
PureWow: “The 13 Best Espresso Martinis in NYC to Kick-Start Your Evening” - Why yes, I did write this article! And you know what? They’re pretty good! This might be one of the most fun articles I’ve ever written. Enjoy!
Xeno Fish Art - My brother finally made an Instagram! Check out his whimsical, balancing, inspired-by-nature metal sculptures. Incredible!
Feel Good Finds - We love a thriftstagram! This Oregon gal has some of the best finds for ~relatively~ cheap. Plus, deals on bundles! Shop secondhand, y’all.
Kiersay - I’m so, so, so beyond inspired by this Canadian gal’s use of colo(u)r in her wardrobe. Pinks and purples and greens, oh my!
Yes, my favorite poem once again—because I have so much beautiful time!
“Alternative Universe in Which I Am Unfazed by the Men Who Do Not Love Me” by Olivia Gatwood
When the businessman shoulder-checks me at the airport,
I do not apologize
Instead, I write him an elegy on the back of a receipt
and tuck it in his hand as I pass through the first class cabin
Like a bee, he will die after stinging me
I am 24 and have never cried
Once a boy told me he “doesn’t believe in labels”
so I embroidered the word “chauvinist”
on the back of his favorite coat
A boy said he liked my hair the other way
so I shaved my head instead of my pussy
While the boy isn’t calling back, I learn carpentry
build a desk, write a book at the desk
I taught myself to come from counting ceiling tiles
The boy says he prefers blondes
and I steam clean his clothes with bleach
The boy says I am not marriage material
and I put gravel in his pepper grinder
The boys says period sex is disgusting
and I slaughter a goat in his living room
The boy doesn’t ask if he can choke me
so I pretend to die while he is doing it
My mother says this is not the meaning of unfazed
When the boy says I curse too much to be pretty
and I tattoo “cunt” on my inner lip
my mother calls it “being very fazed”
But left over from the other universe
are hours and hours of waiting for him to kiss me
and here they are just hours.
Here they are a bike ride across Long Island in June
Here they are a novel read in one sitting
Here they are arguments about God or a full night’s sleep
Here I hand an hour to the woman crying outside of the bar
I leave one on my best friend’s front porch
Send my mother two in the mail
I do not slice his tires
I do not burn the photos
I do not write the letter
I do not beg
I do not ask for forgiveness
I do not hold my breath while he finishes
The man tells me he does not love me
and he does not love me
The man tells me who he is
and I listen
I have so much beautiful time
Affirmation of the week: I have all the time I need.
Question of the week: Do you tend to resist or embrace change?
Thank you all for reading this week’s newsletter! I’m always looking to improve my work, so leave a comment, send me a message, or fill out this form to tell me what you want to read about in upcoming Dear Twenty-Somethings! Also, if you know anyone who might be a good interviewee for the newsletter, let me know in the form. I’m all ears. Thank you always!
If you liked what you read, send this newsletter to a friend! Heck, send it to 10 friends! Sending love and light to you, wherever you are. 🌟
Cheers & happy Wednesday! Stay well and I’ll talk to you next week.
xoxoxo, Quinnie <3